Does it feel like God isn’t answering your prayers? Are you confused as to why He hasn’t altered your circumstances - especially when you’re so desperate for change?

Waiting on God’s timeline can be difficult. Sometimes, it can even feel cruel. But the truth is, God loves you SO much that He may be using your circumstances to build you up into the strong woman you long to be.

How, you ask? Join me as I share, from my own personal experience, how God can use your present situation for your good! No matter what that situation may be.

Show Notes:

• Intro

  • Alright, sister. So I dig into this episode knowing that this can be a tough and sensitive subject. I know this because, in my own walk with God, I’ve lived through some extremely tough situations that lasted a long time - years, even. And some of those situations were extreme and were the very definition of longsuffering.

  • I realize that not every woman listening to this episode will currently be in that kind of situation. But, some will be. So I want you to know right off the bat that I get where you’re coming from - and so does Jesus. In no way is this episode meant to minimize the pain or difficulty that you may be going through. 

  • Instead, this episode is to help you see the amazing work that Jesus can do while you’re in your present situation - no matter how long that lasts. Whether it’s days, weeks, or years. I obviously can’t speak to why God isn’t removing you from your circumstances, or bringing about change, but I can say with certainty that you can change - if you allow Him to do that internal work. You can come out of this situation stronger in faith, in a deeper relationship with your Savior, freed from things currently holding you back from your potential as an empowered Christian woman - even healed. And, again, I know all this from personal experience.  

  • But before we look at some specific things Jesus might be aiming to do, I also want to reassure you that He isn’t asking you to walk through this tough situation alone - on your own power. 

  • God isn’t cruel. Whatever we’re going through, He promises to be right there beside us, lending us His strength, wisdom, and protection. We can lean on and depend on Him. And oftentimes, that’s a major component of the work He wants to do. Because sometimes, He needs you to depend on Him and no one else.

  • But regardless, you’re not alone. 

    • Joshua 1:5 says: “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

    • 1 Peter 5:7 says: “Cast all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.”

    • Romans 8:28: “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

    • Philippians 4:6-7: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

      • One note that I want to point out about this scripture is that God is giving us a formula here. When He tells us not to be anxious, that’s tied to the action of bringing our requests to Him AND being thankful. Why? Because in every situation, even the most dire ones, with God we always have something to be grateful for. Even if it’s just, “God I’m thankful that I’m yours.” Or “I’m thankful that I’m alive and that you’re providing what I need.” Or “I’m grateful for that random interaction that I had yesterday that gave me hope.” 

      • Even if we initially don’t think we have anything to be grateful for…if we really stop and think about it, and begin to pray it out, something usually comes up. 

      • And when we put our hearts and minds and emotions into a focus of thankfulness, that helps to ease the anxiety and other negative things we’re thinking or feeling. One, because being thankful is positive. And, two, because it causes us to focus on the reason for that gratitude - which is God - which then re-aligns us with the source of our hope.

      • Which brings peace, as the Scripture says.

  • And those were just a few verses of Scripture. But I wanted to encourage you today, before getting into the nitty-gritty, that (a) God is totally with you and will equip you, and (b) let you in on a practical formula, based on Philippians 4:6-7, that’s been very helpful for me. (Once it was explained to me that way, versus just being mentioned as a platitude.)

  • Alright, so let’s dive into 2 ways in which Jesus may be working on transforming you while you’re in your current situation. Or, to put it another way depending on your specific situation, 2 possible focuses that He might have. 

• 1) While we tend to focus on the external (i.e., having our circumstances changed), Jesus tends to primarily focus on the internal…because that’s where the real change happens.

  • I alluded to this in the episode teaser, but here’s the thing sister. Our circumstances don’t dictate how we grow and change in Christ. Now, Jesus can use our circumstances to help affect change. However, the real change is internal - it’s inside us. 

  • And this is an integral part of being both a solid, strong Christian and a Jesus empowered woman. We need to be transformed inside - meaning healed from wounds, freed from destructive mindsets or beliefs, have our faith grow solid and strong, learn how to establish healthy boundaries, etc. - so that we’re able to stand firm in Jesus no matter the circumstances. Versus, wanting our circumstances to be changed.

  • Now, again, this isn’t meant to sound insensitive - especially if you’re new to your journey with Christ as a whole or your journey of transforming into a Jesus empowered woman. I came to Christ two years into an emotionally and mentally abusive marriage that was ripe with chaos and hardship. And I know if someone had said this to me back then, I might have reacted as if they didn’t understand the insanity I was living through every day.

  • But I do get it. I get what it means to be in that kind of situation. But I’ve also lived through it - with Jesus. And so I can personally attest to you that, when my ex-husband decided we were divorcing, I came out of that situation a different woman. (Something I’ll be talking about in more detail in the book I’m currently working on.)    

  • Between the time I came to Christ and got divorced, Jesus worked on establishing our relationship. He taught me to listen to His voice and depend on His provision. (He had to be my husband as well as my God even though I was married.) He started killing my co-dependency. He got me to a place where I started standing up for myself. 

  • Which was, in fact, one of the factors leading to the divorce. My ex-husband wanted to do something that wasn’t right, that would have obviously involved both of us, and I said “no.” To which his ultimate response was, “If you don’t do exactly what I want, then we’re getting a divorce.” (He was also thumbing his nose at God, too, at this point - who had been very clearly trying to get his attention. So I think I just gave him a reason to call it quits.) 

  • But regardless, I had spent several years being healed and shaped internally by Jesus. So while those years of marriage were the very definition of chaos and longsuffering, Jesus did some amazing work. I wasn’t yet the empowered woman I am today, some 11 years post-divorce, but I definitely wasn’t the same woman who had married my ex-husband years before.

  • All that to say, still go to God with your requests regarding your situation. But also know that God can carry us through any situation AND change us at the same time. I mean, ultimately, He changed me into someone who can now, per His calling, help other women in similar circumstances. That’s pretty dang amazing when you think about it. (And consider that my ex-husband is still probably resisting God and making the same mess of his life. Just sayin’.)

• 2) There may be certain things that Jesus needs us to see or face in our present circumstances.

  • Now, again, God is not cruel, right? Remember those Scriptures that we read a little bit ago. He’s not going to leave you in a situation without being there with you and equipping you. 

  • That being said, as humans we’re really good at running away from things - especially things that make us uncomfortable. And unfortunately, sometimes the things that we find uncomfortable are the very wounds, mindsets, areas, etc. that God wants or needs to heal. 

  • For example, if God had taken me out of my marriage after I was Saved, would He and I have been able to tackle my co-dependency issues in the same way? After all, codependency is hard to address when you’re not in a codependent relationship. But Jesus tackled that area to the point where, when I divorced, I had no desire or intention to get married again. Let alone in another relationship. Which happened to pair nicely with Jesus calling me into a season of singleness.

  • If God had taken me out of my marriage after I was Saved, would our relationship have been strong enough for me to completely lean on Him and trust Him while I started my life over with a degree but no job, a few thousand dollars, my dog, and whatever possessions fit into my CR-V? Even with the supernatural calm and peace that He gave me as everything came crashing down?

  • If God had taken me out of my marriage after I was Saved, would my faith in Him have been solid and mature enough to still flourish after I moved back in with my mother - who wasn’t Christian? When that meant moving from one state to another and rebuilding community?  

  • Again, I wasn’t the empowered woman you know today some eleven years post-divorce. There was still a lot of work to be done. But, the foundational work that took place during my marriage set me up for success when my marriage ended. And my life suddenly changed in a drastic way. 

  • So as tough as it may be to hear, sister, one reason Jesus may be keeping you in your current situation is because it’s the only or best way to do the internal work that needs to be done.

  • Maybe He can’t, in good conscience, move you on to what’s next until something specific is addressed. Because He wants what’s next to be a blessing not a curse or another source of entrapment.

  • Now what those things are exactly, I obviously can’t say. Every woman’s journey is different. We all have an individual combination of  wounds, past experiences, inner struggles, sin, etc. 

  • But, I don’t need to know because Jesus knows. When I was Saved two years into my marriage, I didn’t have anyone to share with me what I’ve just shared with you. So you’re already ahead of the game. I had to rely on Jesus, and trust Him to point out what we needed to work on, together, in order to transform and heal me - and strengthen me.

  • So sister, ask Jesus. Don’t be afraid. Or, express that fear to Jesus and lay it at His feet. 

  • Let Him get in there and do the important work that needs to be done. He’ll still help you walk through your current situation. But also let Him walk you to the next step in your transformation and empowerment. Let Jesus undo the damage that others have made - including your own blind spots. Things that are keeping you captive and holding you back that you might not even be aware of. 

  • Express your thankfulness to Him for that He’s doing - and what you do have. Lean on Him. Trust Him. Let Him shape and mold you into an empowered Christian woman that, one day, can stand tall and strong amid any situation or circumstance. Cheers!