Not Feeling Empowered as a Christian Woman at Your Church? 2 Tips to Insane Growth with Jesus Anyway

Are you hungry to grow with Jesus into a confident, bold, and empowered Christian woman - but your home church isn’t on the same page?

Are you feeling the struggle between who Jesus is calling you to be and certain teachings or limitations? Are you conflicted because, while your church isn’t completely aligned with where Jesus is taking you, He’s still calling you to be there? (Or maybe you're simply limited in options geographically?)

Sister, I have totally been there! And I’m here to say that all is not lost! Jesus actually began molding into the woman I am today while spending several years in a situation just like the one you’re experiencing. And today, I’m going to share 2 major tips - based on what Jesus did for me - to ensure that your growth and empowerment in Him is not held back in any way!


Show Notes:

  • Intro

    • Alright, sister. Are you ready to dive into this topic? I feel like a rebel just recording this - but that just means I’m like Jesus. And I love that - being rebellious for Jesus.

    • But before I kick this episode off, I have one quick housekeeping item. Jesus specifically called me to start this podcast and to form my business, Relate Escape, in order to serve women just like you. Who are actually women just like me. What I share is rooted in Jesus, but also in my own experiences and walk with Him. 

    • So it’s really important to me that I’m creating and releasing content that serves you. But in order to know if I’m on target, I need to hear from you.

    • Which is why I would love for you to hop over to iTunes and leave a brief review for the podcast. It doesn’t have to be anything long or fancy. Simply let me know what topics or episodes have resonated with you or blessed you in some way…I would really, really appreciate it. So thank you in advance for taking the time to do that within your busy schedule. Trust me, I know how precious time can be.

    • Alright, that’s the end of my housekeeping news flash. Let’s dive right into this - nothing held back.

    • Because I personally know that the struggle can be real. As I shared in the teaser, I’ve experienced this dichotomy where Jesus is calling you to grow in certain ways - and yet that doesn’t align with the church you’re attending. It makes you feel like a fish out of water, doesn’t it? (No pun intended.) 

    • And while I know that not every church is like this - I know that, unfortunately, a lot are. And I know while Jesus can physically relocate people, and place them in different churches, He doesn’t do that 100% of the time. (For legit reasons, and we’ll touch on one of those in a few minutes.) So, at least for right now, you are where you are. Especially if you’re unable to move somewhere else, or Jesus is calling you to this church even if it makes you wonder if He’s got this wrong, right?

    • But, as we know, Jesus is never wrong. It’s one of the most comforting and infuriating aspects of Him - at least that’s what I find. Especially as someone who’s currently called to be single which makes Jesus my quote/unquote man. On one hand, it’s comforting to know that He’s always trustworthy and knows what He’s doing and He’s never wrong. But on the other hand, you can never win an argument with Him. But I digress.

    • So, if this is the situation that you’re in…what can you do? What can you do to continue to deepen your relationship with Jesus; and learn about what legit Biblical femininity is; and be free to serve and grow in ways outside of the children’s ministry and food service? How do you grow in empowerment when you also feel as if you’re kind of trapped in a box?     

    • Let’s look at 2 things that you can implement to tackle just that:

  • 1) Find additional content sources to consume on a regular basis that are aligned with where Jesus is taking you

    • And when I say content sources, I mean podcasts, books, conferences, communities online or in real life…the delivery method doesn’t matter. You do want to make sure, though, that you’re consuming content from legit, Jesus-loving, Biblical sources. So you might want to do some due diligence. You know, do some research or pray about it. Just to make sure that you’re consuming legit, Biblical teaching.  

    • And this tip might seem obvious, but it also might not. Because I know that in some churches, there is this expectation, or focus, or sense of loyalty when it comes to a church’s teaching. Which can make it feel as if there’s something wrong with listening to preaching or teaching outside of one’s church - or even the denomination. 

    • So consuming other content might not have been a natural idea. Or maybe you’ve felt conflicted about doing that. But I want to point out that you follow Jesus above all else. Including above a specific church or denomination. 

    • And sometimes, Jesus will purposefully use outside content when He’s calling you to your specific church - or when you’re just located where you are. 

    • And this was my experience. God Saved me two years into my marriage, when my ex-husband and I lived in another state. So we lived where we lived. Jesus told me to attend a specific, local church and I spent several years there. But it wasn’t a church that was aligned in a lot of ways with true Biblical femininity or encouraging Christian women to be empowered in Jesus. It also didn’t have Jesus at the core or the forefront just in general. So a lot of the teaching from that church, from the pulpit and within the community and its culture, would not have ensured my growth. 

    • So through another Christian, I started listening to the sermons of a church on the other side of the country through their podcast. And in addition to the 1:1 teaching that Jesus was doing in my life, it was through that other church’s preaching and teaching that I learned how to keep Jesus first. I also received deep, legit Biblical teaching on the books of the Bible. 

    • So it was through that content - and not my home church at the time - that I got my solid spiritual food. And that content set a solid foundation for Jesus to build upon in transforming me into a Jesus empowered maiden. In other words, that content was crucial in my growth and development.

    • If I had chosen to remain quote/unquote loyal to my home church, my growth would have been severely limited in those crucial first years as a new Christian. Again, it’s about following Jesus. And Jesus doesn’t limit our growth by saying you can only assume X number of content resources. 

    • So I highly encourage you to explore other resources. If you’re not sure where to start, I can recommend my current church in Ohio which is all about Jesus and women being Biblically empowered. It’s called Heart City; you can find it on Apple Podcasts. But I’ll include the link in the show notes. So if you want to start getting some solid spiritual food sooner rather than later, you can start with Heart City while you explore additional options. 

    • Alright, let's move on to Tip #2.

  • 2) Ask Jesus if He purposefully wants to build you up outside of your church - and then have you serve as an example inside of your church as to  what a Biblical, Jesus empowered woman looks like

    • Now, at first this might not sound like a tip. But hang with me for a minute and you’ll see where I’m going with this.

    • This also might sound intimidating - especially if you’re a newer Christian. But believe it or not, this was what Jesus did in the first church that I attended after giving my life to Christ. The same one that I just spoke about a moment ago.

    • That might sound crazy. But Jesus doesn’t need us to be highly experienced; He needs us to be willing to go where He leads and to trust Him. 

    • Jesus needs willing hearts. And if you’re a woman chasing after Jesus, you’re a willing heart. And there are other women (and men) who need to see what it looks like to be a woman whose identity, authority, and freedom is truly in Christ. And who are living out what it really means to be a woman Biblically.

    • I don’t say this to put pressure on you, but you might be the only (or one of a very few) women of that caliber that your church ever sees or experiences. If you happen to be in a church that isn’t too open to change, sometimes the only way Jesus can show them something different is to inject someone new into their fold. Someone who has a heart truly turned towards Him versus tradition, or patriarchal views that conflict with Biblical truth, or those kinds of things.

    • And again, I know this can sound scary. But I’ve walked this. And so I can say with certainty that if Jesus calls you in this manner, He will be there to support you. I was at that particular church for six or seven years, and Jesus used me in that church more than I got from that church. He actually pointed me to Ezekiel about the watchmen… I want to say it’s Ezekiel 33, but I might be off a bit…but the scripture basically talks about how if God tasks you with warning or sharing a message with others, and you don’t share that with them, the sin is yours. But if you do share that message or warning, and they choose not to heed it, then the sin is on them. And I’m obviously paraphrasing a bit; but Jesus pointed me to that Scripture prior to having me speak up about certain things. 

    • One of those things was putting me in the sphere of one of the secondary pastors who, I learned from firsthand experience, was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. He was not working on team Jesus. And when I emailed my senior pastor, whom I had done volunteer work for years and who knew me really well, the reaction was to pull me into a meeting two days later where the entire pastoral staff was present - including the pastor that was essentially a wolf. 

    • And there wasn’t any investigation. It wasn’t prayer over. They brought me into this meeting and basically acted as if I had made everything up. And the point of the gathering was to get me to take back what I said. I remember at one point my senior pastor asking why I had done what I had. And I replied, “It’s not coming from me. It’s coming from God. Have you prayed over it?”

    • And my senior pastor said no, he hadn’t prayed over it. When I refused to yield to what they wanted, they revoked my church membership. Nothing happened to the pastor in question. I ended up moving soon after and, on a whim one day, I went to that church’s website and both that pastor and the senior pastor were no longer at that church. And when I tracked down the senior pastor, he was also no longer a senior pastor.

    • So clearly, God was trying to give them a chance to address the issue. And they refused, so they reaped the consequences.

    • Now, I’m not saying Jesus will necessarily ask something of that kind from you. But I share that example because there is no way I would have been able to obey Jesus, and do what He asked, if my only spiritual food had been from my home church. You can imagine the content my home church was sharing, based on the story I just told you. If the senior pastor doesn’t seek Jesus when someone he knows, and has trusted, speaks up about one of his staff…that tells you where Jesus wasn’t according to that church.

    • But whether Jesus asks you to speak up about anything, really, or whether it’s just about the congregation witnessing how you live your life, and what you do, and the decisions you make, and what you go after…you’re a window into something better. Into truth, freedom, an identity rooted in Jesus. A woman who is going to follow her Lord and Savior no matter where He leads or what He asks. Who has confidence and boldness.

    • Now was it pleasant to have my church membership removed as a result for following Jesus? No; it hurt at the time. But I don’t regret doing what I did. I don’t regret being a Jesus empowered maiden. 

    • So take it to Jesus. Ask Him if He wants you to be a living example of who God’s daughters should be. And if He says, yes, let it serve as motivation for doing Tip #1 - finding the right spiritual food through other resources. Ask Him to lead you to the right teachings and preachings so that He can build you up for your own growth - and to show other women what’s possible. And how amazing it is to be a woman in Jesus like that. 

  • Wrap-up

    • Sister, again, I don’t mean to put undue pressure on you. But this is one of the many, many amazing things about our God. He can accomplish so much at the same time. He can build you up, whether you’re a new Christian or a seasoned Christian ready for new heights, while also working in the lives of others at the same time.

    • And, honestly, it’s good practice. Because at the core of being a Jesus empowered woman, it’s about two things. Following Jesus wherever He leads - and impacting the world by serving others. Not to our detriment. Not by putting ourselves last and not indulging in some much needed self-care. Not by refusing to partake the many blessings He puts before us. That kind of stuff isn’t part of how we roll. But do follow Jesus. Our loyalty is to Him first and foremost.

    • That being said, sister, I hope these tips have resonated with you today. I hope you’re inspired. Motivated. Ready to move forward! Don’t forget to check the show notes for helpful links and leave a brief review over on iTunes. (Again, I would love to hear from you!) And I’ll see you soon!